3 drafts later...

I actually intended on blogging 2 days ago but then mid-writing I felt like, what's the point in it? What am I even blogging about? Why am I just repeating the same jargon I wrote last time?

So I'll blog tonight since I'm in a blogging mood.

I'm feeling a little less stressed as I've actually got a plan together for my project. This is why I could never ever go into research because I don't feel independent enough or creative enough to come up with research questions and follow through with the research. It's heavily stressful because unlike 3rd year, I'm totally on my own, my own research, my own topic, my own everything. Just me and a supervisor really. It's totally different from when I basically had my research question handed to me on a plate and worked with 2 others on the same project, just the write up was independent. This is what it feels like to be completely not spoon fed as they call it. I've had so much trouble as I failed my proposal, it wasn't viable as a research question and I'm scared this one will fall through too, but I've tried my best to make it as robust as possible so we'll see. At least I have a supportive supervisor I guess. Time is running out as my resubmission deadline is 7th July. So as you can see, I've been very stressed over the past 2 weeks, trying to stop myself from endless procrastination, failing to fix my overly screwed up sleeping pattern (and failing to do so, it's now 3am and I'm still wide awake), having to live life with this dodgy eye...

On the subject of the dodgy eye, I'm finally getting seen by a GP next Monday about it. I find it odd that I'm being seen by a GP and not a specialist at a hospital though. Maybe this GP is a specialist... idk how these things work.

My skin has been breaking out like mad ever since I ran out of patches. I've been too lazy to get some more but I'll remember to next Monday since I'm going to the GP anyway. I've just been treating my skin a little better by drinking tons of water, did a clay mask yesterday when my skin felt bad and just going to keep my routine with masks and stuff until aunt flo comes. Sigh, the patch is so unsightly but I don't really have another option except the pill but I went a bit delusional and shit last time I was on the pill (you can read my entry on Microgynon 30 if you scroll back a bit). Felt myself going insane through that month.

Cannot wait to get started on this project and then holiday to Corfu in August. Really need a week away from London this year as I realised I may be employed after August and then that would mean no more holidays, lazing around and stuff. Reality is going to slap me in the face hard when I start looking for a job and hopefully working and earning a steady income.

I'm not mentally ready for this.

Overtime = Overkill

Did overtime at work this week for 2 days, let's just say I'm never doing that again. Day 1 - finished 15 minutes later than usual, day 2 - finished 30 minutes later than usual. This place struggles when it isn't even busy. Day 1 I had to help ground floor because they're always bloody slow. Day 2 I actually ran away from helping anyone until I was caught and forced to menswear to help out LOL. The manager there who used to be my evil team leader that made my life hell when I started, saw me come down to help and gave the biggest smile (fake smile) and told me to help with folding. I was like oh okay easy folding, at least it beats helping ground floor clear dumps. He made my life hell again by being super picky with the folding, I mean some of these menswear clothes are HUGE XL size and I was trying my best with the folding board and all because the buttons weren't centred he made me re-fold them. Can't really complain though because folding is probably the easiest thing I've helped out with when we've been forced to stay behind. Because I did overtime, this week feels shorter than usual for me, back to work in another 2 days. Sob.

I've quit league for a while because of my eye, too much gaming is obviously going to affect my eyes. I'm being referred to a hospital as it still hasn't gotten much better despite having spent around £40-£50 on eye drops that did nothing to my eye. I read online that the eye is supposed to be able to heal minor injuries overnight, but I guess this problem I have isn't as superficial as first suggested by the optician. Sigh, I just want to know what's wrong with it so I can see properly again, it's getting really annoying working and going out with 1 dodgy eye, I can't even look at people properly because one eye is blurred LOL I just hope people don't see that I'm having trouble seeing. Awks.

Been addicted to Brave Frontier, it's a phone game but so addictive. I guess that's been my replacement for league at the moment. Not really missing league as I was starting to get bored of it but I just play when my boyfriend plays now, skills are going to get rusty. I WILL BE BACK.

Changed my bedding just now. I thought I'd be cool and rep the H&M Home department by buying a duvet cover but turns out this duvet cover is a little too big for my single sized duvet o__O I've learnt that duvets are not universally sized after all. I wonder how many people that buy duvet covers from H&M take them home and find that it doesn't even fit their duvet - mind you, not many people bring them back for a refunds so... maybe it's just me that has a weird sized duvet. This duvet cover is so weird as well, it has 2 gaping holes at the top of the duvet for what? I have no idea. Swedish people have weird designs (I'm assuming Swedish people designed it as H&M is a Swedish company after all). Guess I'm just going to deal with it, it's not too big length wise so it's okay as long as I don't wake up with the filling halfway down the cover. Don't ever buy polyester duvet covers guys - 100% cotton all the way.

Watched the new X-Men movie today with the boyf, we didn't really see what the hype was about. Having watched First Class yesterday before coming out to watch Days of the Future Past today, I actually thought the former was better by a mile. Maybe the hype was around Jennifer Lawrence as Mistique as she had a much bigger role in the plot but the plot itself was better in First Class.

Anyway, this was just a short entry to compensate for my lack of/inconsistency in blogging recently, been enjoying too much freedom that there wasn't even much to blog about besides my laziness. Now I'm off to continue my last days of freedom by watching Catfish.