Wednesday 15 August 2012

Women and men can't be "just friends"?

Yeah, I'm sure you've all heard this before. But is it really true? Let me tell you a little story...

You get to know a guy, with 100% intention of becoming friends. You're someone that likes to meet new people and make new friends. So you start talking then become friends as you start to know more about each other. To him, it seems like a potential relationship could be in line. To you, it seems like you've made a new friend who you may be able to confide in whenever. Now this is the conflict here. The guy seems to try and advance this "potential relationship" and you're just here fighting off his advances because, dude, "I'm just not that into you". The time comes when the guy musters enough courage to confess his feelings and you're like "wat?" feeling a bit awkward because you don't feel the same but also flattered at the same time. So now the time comes for you to reject this poor soul who probably has spent sleepless nights thinking about you and how to tell you his feelings. Then as you do, the guy doesn't like your response and then goes all cold shoulder on you the next time you talk, sounding all bitter and spiteful towards life itself (in reality, we all know that he's actually spiteful towards YOU for rejecting him). So then you're taken aback by his harsh words and his sudden change of attitude. What do you do? Try to cheer him up as a friend would do but also risk giving him wrong signals at the same time? Or do you try and forget about him completely and that your friendship never existed because even you wouldn't treat a friend like that?

The statement that a woman and a man cannot ever be "just friends" is complete nonsense to me because every relationship begins off as a simple friendship. If someone is skipping that friendship stage then they're clearly out for only one thing. Don't know about you but there are a few special males in my life who I consider family (but of course, not my family). I guess the only difference being we pretty much grew up together, watched each other grow throughout the school years. If there has been no mutual attraction there then there's no reason that there would be in the present day. So there's some proof that males and females can be just friends and nothing more.

Nothing is more irksome than a guy using the excuse "a man and woman cannot be just friends" to stay away from you. Clearly the male ego is bruised from this rejection and thus any excuse that sounds legit will be okay as long as it gives him a reason for him to stay away from you. I'm sure there are men out there that can actually handle rejection well and settle for being friends in the meantime. But there are also men that will stop engaging in everyday conversation with you if you tell him how it is. What is this? I don't even... It makes me angry because don't waste my time trying to be friends with you when all you do is end up removing me from your life once I tell you I just want to be friends. Sorry if I damaged your man pride but you can't automatically ask any girl to be your girlfriend so quickly.

Bottom line to this rant is that some men need to learn that men and women can be just friends.        

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